How Do I Explain?

Many times I have no idea how to explain autism to my eight year old son. He knows Logan has autism but I don't think he actually gets it. He doesn't understand that when Logan has a meltdown and is screaming bloody murder there is nothing I can do about it. You usually can't comfort him by talking, holding, or trying to soothe him. More times than not you just have to go with and let him get it out of his system. However, it is equally as hard to get Zach to back off. I will admit Logan likes to pick at him. But I think that is Logan's way of playing with him. He is still non-verbal and can't tell Zach he wants to play. Maybe pushing on him is Logan's way of doing that. I have tried to tell Zach that Logan doesn't understand things the way we do. That is the best way I know to help Zach understand autism. I am sure there are times that Zach feels jipped in the attention department. I hate that thought but I guess it is bound to happen sometimes. One such dilemma happened this past Friday. The friend I babysit for always comes in and goes to sit at one end of the couch. I sit at the other end and Logan sits in the space in between. When she came in Logan didn't come sit between us. So Zach took the opportunity to come sit there. Oh no, Logan saw him sitting there and came unglued. He comes up behind Zach and starts pushing and trying to kick him off the couch. I told Zach to go sit in the recliner. He starts whining and says he wants to sit by me. He said he loved me and wanted to sit by me. I tried to tell him that all he was doing was making Logan mad. So Zach trots over to the chair saying he will sit over there since nobody loves him anymore. That just tore my heart out. After a few minutes, he tries to come back over and the same thing happens. I got up and went to the recliner so he could sit on my lap. Logan didn't want that either! I asked Zach if he could sit there by himself. He looks at me with tears rolling down his red face and says, "Fine, I'll just go to my room since nobody out here loves me!" He doesn't understand that I was trying to keep him away from Logan so he would not get beat up! Now, can someone tell me what the heck I do? Helping Zach deal with autism's effect on the family is almost as hard dealing with the autism stuff. When Zach got up and went to his room, I lost it for a minute. I sat on the arm of the couch with Logan climbing on me and tears started rolling. My friend got up and hugged me. She said it would be allright. Sometimes I really wonder about that. Many times I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. Let me tell you all, it really sucks sometimes! God bless to all.